Epilogue: Reflections on a Year of Running

Remembrance Day 2016

During Remembrance Day weekend of 2016, I had shared online a picture of me having returned from a run with a poppy attached to my hat. Little did I know that would mark the start of one solid year of being focused on running, after having given up running for so long.

I came back to the blog, and decided to finish what I had started years ago: to run five marathons. And while I was no longer able to complete "Five by 35," since I'd already passed the age of 35 a few years ago, having to deal with the death of my dad and wanting that loss to mean something definitely gave me the motivation to run one more. It wasn't pretty, but it got done - seems like a theme for my life! But nothing that comes without work is worth having anyway, right?

I hurt my knee during those last few weeks of training for number five and, were it not for desperately wanting to complete that run for my dad and everyone who donated to my fundraising campaign for Diabetes Canada, I likely would not have chosen to run on race day. In hindsight, while I was mentally ready and prepared to complete number five, I knew my knee was not up to running 42.2 km; still, I went out there anyway. Since that time, I've undergone hours of physiotherapy and exercises to help repair the damage I did. 

Well-earned hardware and swag

After a few months, my physiotherapist suggested I join a run club hosted by his clinic. As you may know, I am not, nor have I ever been, a social runner (proof: see posts here, here and here). But this experience was new and - dare I say it? - kind of enjoyable. It was nice to be with other runners of all different skill levels, hearing about their race experiences - and of all manner of running injury they have also endured. 

It was only because of my physiotherapist and the run club that I decided to go for my RUN VAN Hat Trick: running all three Vancouver International Marathon Society-organized running events in one year. Obviously, I'd already done the big one, the BMO Vancouver International Marathon, in May. What followed was the Turkey Trot on Granville Island during Canadian Thanksgiving, then the 5k event at the Fall Classic just this past weekend.

RUN VAN Hat Trick: done!

Truthfully, deep down I'd set my sights on running the 10k - if not the half marathon - at the Fall Classic. But the knee just wouldn't let me. And this time... I listened. As a result, I was able to lure my husband into running with me, given the short distance of the event. This was his first real race, and the first one we have ever - officially [wink] - done together. And I still completed my RUN VAN Hat Trick regardless, so... wins all around, I'd say.

My knee continues to be a work in progress but after the year of running I've had, that's not necessarily a bad thing. This year has really changed my perspectives on running, and in positive, unexpected ways. I've realized there will always be another goal, another race upon which to set my sights. My long distance days may be over for now, but I've learned to never say never. My hope now is that I'll be able to relax, really take the time to listen to my body - and just enjoy each run as it comes.  

Fall Classic 2017: our first official race together
but hopefully not the last. Pic cred: M. Boulton.

Rehab

I've been 10 days sober. From running, of course.

Not that running is/was a drug, or an addiction - for me, anyway. But it was definitely something that took priority for the last almost-five months. This past week and a half has been different - felt different. I guess that's what happens when one no longer has a marathon to train for (not complaining).

Reflections on a dry month
Following a house party involving a lot of scotch, I threw a bit of a fit one month out from the date of number five, and vowed to stay dry until marathon day. Amazingly, I actually did this... and it was a bit of an eye opener! 

I would be out with friends, ordering water while they all ordered beer. Not surprisingly, I got bored the longer I stayed out. It's like "fun" is inversely related to "alcohol consumption". Again, not a surprise. 

And yet... I felt better about my choices. True, I wasn't having the "good time" the same way my friends were. But I knew I would certainly feel better in the morning. There wouldn't be a two-day hangover in my future. 

Don't get me wrong: I love a good drink. I drink beer, wine, scotch, vodka... you name it. I don't discriminate (well, except for fruity drinks - like, really?). But being teetotal for just over four weeks was more revelatory than expected. I had a beer the same night I'd finished number five, and have drunk plenty since - no more being dry for me - but I do think I have a different perspective on socially drinking now than I did before i.e. moderation? That's a good thing. 

Good eats
Something else in the way of "healthy living" also happened while I was training for number five. For years I was terrible at brown bagging my lunch. But somehow, with number five in the picture, I managed to create good lunch habits. I've been bringing salads for lunch most days, and even vary them up to keep things interesting - which, I realized, is actually the key with eating salad so often! I'm a huge foodie and love trying new restaurants and new dishes all the time, but at least at lunchtime I've been able to create a space where I don't have to worry about what I'm putting in my body because I know that it's food that is good for me. Hopefully, running or no, I'll be able to maintain that going forward.

Knee-d more painkillers
You may recall I had some trouble with my knee in the week leading up to number five (see blog posts here and here). Following the marathon, I thought my knee pain had miraculously disappeared! Sadly, I was totally delusional mistaken. 

I gave my body a week or so to recover and heal, but sure enough: the knee pain was still there. Not that I was particularly surprised, but I went to a physiotherapist yesterday and it looks like I'll definitely need some rehab. Bad biomechanics! You are my nemesis! But, meh - what else am I gonna do? It's not like I'm running another marathon any time soon [wink]. 

My dad 
I've been wanting to write a post about what this whole experience meant to me... running in memory of my dad, and rekindling my old goal to run five marathons because of that. Alas, I've been unable to find the words. When I locate them, I'll let y'all know.

All You Kneed Is Love, bitches! (Guess I'm not done with the knee puns just yet.) 

How to Train for and Run a Marathon: A Non-Exhaustive Shortlist

In training:

1. Stick to the training schedule.
2. Run at times of day similar to the scheduled race time to get used to what might happen on race day e.g. waking up early enough, eating breakfast, prepping gear, getting dressed, stretching and warming up, etc.
3. Run in all kinds of weather - because you never know what you're gonna get on race day.

   

   I was here... and here, and here...

4. Run on the same surface as the race to condition your body for similar impact e.g. concrete or trails versus treadmills.
5. Pay attention to your diet (nutrition is important).
6. Stay hydrated.
7. Get enough sleep.
8. Find someone who knows more than you about running and ask them lots of questions about everything you don't know - but know that not everything works the same or as well for everyone. 
9. Find a good registered massage therapist and visit him/her as often as you can.
10. Find a good physiotherapist and consult him/her as needed.
11. Give yourself lots of encouragement every day.
12. Surround yourself with people who support your goals. 
13. Ignore the "Negative Nancies" and "Downer Dougs".
14. Don't be a douchebag runner to other runners. This includes not being a "Negative Nancy" or "Downer Doug."

Specifically for race day:

1. Get enough sleep leading up to the race (tip: even a good night's sleep two nights before versus the night before the race can be enough - just try and stay well rested as race day approaches).
2. Don't try or do anything new e.g. with clothing (potential chafing), gear (unexpected issues with weight, function), breakfast, gels or other nutrition (avoiding digestive issues), etc.
3. Get to the start line with time to spare.
4. Enjoy the race! You've earned it.

Journal entry 

Today's run: 23 km and technically, the last LSD in the training schedule. Yay for tapering! Weather: overcast and partly sunny this morning, which is why I deliberately went out early (note: it's raining now but at least I'm watching the bad weather from my couch instead of being in it). Feeling: glad to have missed the rain! And looking forward to the rest of the weekend.

...and also here.

I Am ...

A runner. 

A person who feels so much better about myself and life in general when I've been running.

Much less likely to freak out about the little things when I keep up with a running schedule. 

Annoyed by inconsiderate ignoramuses who are allowed to frequent my regular running routes. This includes, but is not limited to, oblivious dog walkers, full-of-it cyclists and parents who can't be bothered to parent their own children.

Easily frustrated when I've realized how far I've been set back by an injury or a lapse in my training.

A girl who really needs a specific goal to stay motivated. (Case in point: 2011. No races. No running.)

Incredibly disappointed that I wasn't able to run the race I'd trained for all spring. It still bothers me. There's no sense in denying it.

Aware that I need to move on from not being able to run the race I'd trained for all spring.

Going back to school in the fall and would like to complete a full marathon before then because I really thought I'd have #3 in the bag by now.

Aiming to complete a marathon this summer, as a result. On the horizon: the Marathon by the Sea in Saint John, New Brunswick. Date: August 12, 2012.

Unsure if trying to run a marathon by the end of the summer is realistic, but I'm willing to use it as something to work towards if, for nothing else, to keep me motivated for the next few months.

Confident that, if I am unsure about the performance of my leg in any way, that I would not do anything to risk re-injury or jeopardize my ability to finish Five by 35. I've got plenty of time and really don't need to rush things.

Still working on my biomechanics (gotta love physio!) and realizing that there will always be room to improve when it comes to this. 

Happy to be where I am, despite everything. Each experience in running has taught me something new.

Amazed at how much I've learned about myself, and how much more I have yet to learn, just by running.  

Thankful that I am able to run.

I am ... not really into heels. These are more my speed. 
More on my most recent purchase to come.

Saying Goodbye to Marathon #3

Here we are. It's race day in Tofino and Ucluelet and instead of running Edge to Edge I am sitting in front of my computer in Vancouver. 

I made the executive decision last weekend to not run. My recovery's been going well, but I wasn't feeling strong enough and didn't want to risk re-injury after making so much progress.

But here's the thing. This is probably a little strange, but in the past few weeks I've found myself alternating between the five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Is that weird? It's an injury, not a death in the family ... right? But often I'd wonder what I did differently (why now? What did I do wrong?) and then feel outraged that my Five by 35 schedule had been disrupted without any explanation. Or I'd get off the treadmill in my apartment building and be on the verge of tears, so upset that my leg still didn't feel right. 

I think part of the reason why I haven't blogged in the last week or so is because my emotions have just been all over the place. Quite honestly, I've felt a bit mental about it all. Is this normal? Part of me thinks that it is really strange to be having such a strong reaction to an overuse injury.

Then again, this was my first marathon after being off running for so long. I'd made such a big stink about it, starting a new blog and telling everyone about my running goals. And then, as you know, I'm a huge believer that good things come with bad; training was going extremely well and after I'd PB'd at the BMO Half Marathon maybe I should've seen this coming.

As for right now, in this very instant, I am okay. Even though I woke up thinking about the marathon I was not running today, and the finish line I would not cross, I also decided to go outside for a slow 6 km; I'm walking every four minutes but things are improving. 

So I guess this is acceptance - for now, anyway. And as best as it can be on a race day that I am not running.

Working my way back. Today's 6 km: almost feeling normal but not quite there.

On The 60-Day DL

As you know, I recently injured myself during training. I've started to think of myself as being on the DL ... that's disabled list, for you non-baseball fans. I'm no baseball expert but as far as I know, injured players can be placed on the disabled list for either 15 or 60 days. 

In my case, it's unfortunately starting to look like I'll be out for 60 days instead of 15.

I've been religiously doing the exercises I've been given at physio, but my last real run was May 14 - a fateful day, to be sure - which means I've been out 10 days. I tested my leg a few days ago on the treadmill, but my physiotherapist cautioned that if it started to feel any worse than a two out of 10 on the uncomfortable scale, I should cease activity; that didn't give me much to work with. I got off the treadmill after 15 minutes - most of which was spent walking, not running.

I was back at my sports medicine clinic for a check-up today and after a bit of poking and prodding, it's clear that my hamstring is still not happy. With only two weeks and two days to go until Edge to Edge, I can't help but think, I may not be able to run this thing.

The thought of not being able to run the race I trained for all spring is hugely disappointing, but I need to be realistic. I can barely run 15 minutes, let alone 42.2 km. And I certainly don't want to cause any further damage that could ruin any chance I have of running in the next few months.

My physiotherapist happens to be a sports nut himself. He's done a Half Ironman, a cycling tour from Vancouver to San Francisco (he and his friend averaged 100 km a day!) and was training to run the BMO Vancouver Marathon ... when he blew out his back in a snowboarding accident. Did he run the marathon? Hells, no. But - he will be doing Tough Mudder next month and I would bet anything that he'll sign up for the full at BMO again next spring.

So. I think there's a lesson to be learned here and I think it's something like this: "Those who choose to rest today, will race again another day."

More rehab updates to come. And I guess I'm going to have to start thinking (again!) about what races I want to run in order to achieve my Five by 35.

Houston, We Have A Problem

It's been a tough week.

It all started with my long run. After taking, what I felt, was a much needed weekend break from running, I set out after work on Monday to do 29 km. With about 10 km to go, I started feeling some tightness behind my left knee. I kept running, believing this to be no more than just a twinge.

Sadly, I was wrong.

With only three km to go and into the home stretch, I could barely walk, let alone finish my run. I had to call my husband to come pick me up. It's the first and only time I've ever not completed a long run.

We got home, I hobbled into our apartment ... and I immediately burst into tears.

I've been fortunate to have been mostly injury-free ever since I started running, experiencing only a minor setback last fall with a strain to my right quadricep. Many friends have asked me for advice on injury prevention and my reply has usually gone something like this:

• Slow down when you need to slow down. Most of us are recreational runners; there's no need to push yourself to the point where you may do more harm than good. That's just stupid.  
• Pay attention to your body. Pain is the precursor to injury.
• When in doubt, go to physio.

So I went to physio. And the diagnosis was four key words that all runners hate to hear: "It's an overuse injury."

In my mind, this is the utmost worst thing that can be spoken to anyone who is training for a race and it's because the best and first treatment is rest. 

Rest means not running. Not running means not making the weekly mileage. Not making the weekly mileage means falling behind. 

It's a tough pill to swallow, but I suppose if this was going to happen to my hamstring it's better that it's happened now, with four weeks to go until Marathon #3, versus right before race day.  In that sense, I suppose I lucked out. 

At least I can rehab, work on my biomechanics (gotta love physio!) and rest up. Rehabilitating properly now means I can reduce my risk of a more serious injury that might keep me from achieving my other running goals. 

That's all I can do for now: take it easy and try to be patient. Admittedly, not my best virtues but hopefully ones I can cultivate while on hiatus.

Did some spring cleaning recently and found 
all this tucked away. Keeping an eye on the prize.